It feels like a nightmare when I fight our cancerous reality-- live and react in fear. I am absolutely hopeless. There's nothing I or any doctor can do to change the outcome of his life.
But when I'm not fighting it, when I am still, I have inexplicable peace. There is nothing I can do about it. I love our son today and raise him up to know he is not in control of his own life. One handsome gift from God to be enjoyed here for a short time or a long time. It isn't any person's decision which.
I do believe the One who gave Josiah to us loves him more than Stephen and I do. And yet, I fully expect to fight Him over and over and over on this point. I am so thankful for a God who allows me to be stubborn, to question Him, to scream at Him, and to call Him a liar.
Nothing I do or say changes who He is and always will be. Thank you, Jesus.
The Lord will fight for you, and you shall hold your peace.